The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My feet surprised me
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize