so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
