"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
