i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
