if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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