Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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