No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
