Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
