I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
