South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
