if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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