I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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