your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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