I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Randomize
