I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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