Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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