Midget sex pt 2 tonight
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
