We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
