brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
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