It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
