her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I really donβt want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize