so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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