im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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