Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
