To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
