what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
