my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
