a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
