Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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