Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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