I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Randomize
