you're like a bully in the Christmas story
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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