...so i touched it.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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