there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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