fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
porn star boner night. come get it.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize