she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
