stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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