I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
