You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize