i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
