No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
