90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
did you just send me my own nude
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
