Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
