so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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