WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize
