And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
We need a shit load of segways right now
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
