It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
This is the high leading the old right now
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
