i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
