Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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