but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
