Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
just tell him i said nine months
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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